Paddling Against the Current: A Reflection on Therapy, Resilience, and Connection
Earlier this week, I stood by the East River and watched two kayakers making their way north on a particularly windy afternoon. The water was rough—whitecaps curling and breaking, the current pulling strongly against them—but they stayed the course, paddling in rhythm. One led, the other followed, adjusting to the movement of the waves. It was striking to witness their quiet determination, the way they seemed to move as one unit. There was no shouting or visible struggle, only a deep, wordless communication. You could sense their mutual trust—one taking the lead through the chop, the other following close behind, both committed to reaching their destination.
The Metaphor of the River
As I watched, I couldn’t help but think about therapy—and life itself. There are times when we move easily with the current. The wind is at our back, the water calm. During those seasons, everything feels aligned: relationships flow, decisions come easily, and we may even forget how much effort it takes to stay balanced when the tide turns. But then there are the other times—when we are paddling upstream against the forces of loss, uncertainty, or change. These moments test our endurance. Even the smallest movements forward require focus and resilience.
Therapy, in many ways, is the process of learning how to paddle through those challenging waters. It’s about developing emotional awareness, mindfulness, and connection—learning to stay present even when the wind picks up. It’s about having someone beside you, not to take over your paddle, but to help you find rhythm and direction when the waves threaten to pull you off course.
The Power of Support and Relationship
Watching those kayakers reminded me that, just as they relied on one another, humans are not meant to navigate life’s challenges alone. Connection is not a luxury; it’s a necessity for emotional survival. Research consistently shows that healing and resilience grow in relationship—with others and with ourselves.
At Transcendent Self Therapy, we see this truth play out every day. Therapy provides a relational space to process what’s happening internally and externally, to feel seen, supported, and gently challenged. It’s a form of guided companionship through the unpredictable waters of being human. Whether it’s navigating anxiety, depression, life transitions, creative blocks, or trauma, therapy helps you find your footing—and your paddle—again.
A Mindful Pause Amid the Motion
As the Founder and Director of Transcendent Self Therapy, much of my day involves supervision, administrative work, and tending to the many moving parts that keep our Brooklyn therapy practice running. The pace can be intense, and like many of us living in New York City, I often find myself immersed in to-do lists, logistics, and responsibilities that can make the hours blur together.
That day by the East River, I decided to take a brief, mindful pause. I stepped outside the flow of my day and simply observed—the skyline shimmering across the water, the sunlight glinting off the glass of distant buildings, the subtle hues of gold and gray rippling across the waves. The rhythmic sound of paddles cutting through water was grounding, almost meditative.
In those few quiet minutes, I felt my nervous system begin to regulate. My shoulders dropped, my breath slowed, and my heart rate softened. A small smile appeared without my consciously trying to summon it. This was mindfulness in action—not an elaborate meditation practice, but a simple act of noticing.
Mindfulness as an Anchor in Therapy
Mindfulness is not about escaping reality; it’s about deepening our awareness of it. In therapy, mindfulness allows us to observe our internal states with curiosity instead of judgment. It helps us recognize patterns of thought and emotion that keep us caught in cycles of struggle, and it opens the door to change through presence rather than force.
When we bring mindfulness into therapy, we slow down the mental “current” long enough to notice what’s happening beneath the surface. We become attuned to the body—the tightening in the chest, the shallowness of breath, the ache of sadness, or the flutter of anxiety. By observing rather than reacting, we create a space where healing can take root.
This is something I often discuss with clients: the nervous system’s remarkable ability to regulate when given time, attention, and compassionate awareness. Just as the kayakers adjusted to the rhythm of the river rather than fighting against it, mindfulness invites us to move with what is—gently, intentionally, and with trust in the process.
The Therapeutic Relationship as Co-Regulation
One of the most powerful aspects of therapy is co-regulation—the way two nervous systems can communicate safety and stability to one another. In the therapy room, this might look like slowing the pace of speech, grounding with breath, or simply holding steady eye contact. These small, relational cues remind us that we are not alone in our experience.
The kayakers embodied this perfectly. They weren’t in separate battles with the wind; they were moving together, each taking cues from the other. Therapy offers that same dynamic—two people in attunement, navigating difficulty with shared focus and care. Over time, this relationship becomes a model for how clients can relate to themselves with the same steadiness and compassion.
Mindfulness Beyond the Therapy Room
Mindfulness doesn’t have to be reserved for meditation cushions or therapy sessions. It can be found in the small pauses of everyday life: watching the light shift on the water, feeling your feet against the pavement as you walk, noticing the way the air feels when you inhale. These moments of presence recalibrate the nervous system and remind us that beauty still exists, even when life feels turbulent.
When we allow ourselves to pause, our awareness expands. We can see our challenges in context—just one bend in a much larger river. We gain perspective, patience, and gratitude for the strength it takes to keep moving forward.
The Rhythm of Healing
Healing is not linear, and it’s rarely effortless. It’s a rhythm we learn to follow, even when we lose the beat. Some days we feel carried by the current; other days we’re tired, paddling against the wind. But each stroke matters. Each moment of presence, each session of therapy, each deep breath is an act of returning—to ourselves, to connection, to the greater flow of life.
That image of the two kayakers has stayed with me. They were small figures against the vastness of the river and skyline, yet their persistence felt monumental. They reminded me that even in moments of resistance, there is grace in effort—and that support, whether from a companion or a therapist, transforms struggle into resilience.
Closing Reflection
Therapy, at its core, is about movement and awareness. It helps us navigate both calm and storm, teaching us how to listen deeply—to our emotions, to our bodies, and to the wisdom within. It offers companionship and guidance as we learn to trust the process of life itself.
So whether you find yourself flowing easily or pushing against the current, remember: healing happens in connection, in mindfulness, and in the courage to keep paddling—together.